Let’s face it, I’m pretty sarcastic… and pretty damn witty (Though Brian would often disagree).  So naturally, I  gravitate towards those who share my dark sense of humor.

I discovered Capitol Hillbillies several months ago and I’ve been hooked ever since.  (I actually spent an entire weekend reading EVERY SINGLE comic.)  CHB creator, Chris Lange, is a pretty sweet (and cute) dude with a light mean streak.  I really do love the way he incorporates his friends and real life experiences into his post.  My favorite posts, of course, are of the sexual nature–especially when it involves Harem Hottie Matt Hughes.  Judging by the number of Matt Hughes references, methinks that Chris and his friends are voracious power bottoms… and EVERYBODY loves a power bottom.  (See my obsession with CockyBoys’ Jesse Santana.)

To Chris and the CHB gang, thanks for making me laugh every week.  You’re a welcome distraction from the miles of hard cock that cum across my screen and desk everyday.

Be sure to head to StudMall.com to get ALL OF OUR MOVIES FEATURING MATT HUGHES.  Head over to CockyBoys.com to see Jesse Santana.

You know Love It!

-Hugo Harley, Certified GPA

Here is Part II of the Harley Awards.  I’ll just finish rounding out my selects from the past year.

Outstanding Actor in a Feature Film:  Where the sex actually comes second!  Each winner showed that they had the acting chops to carry a film….though getting naked didn’t hurt.

Outstanding Actor

Outstanding Hunk/Stud Feature:  No Twinks Allowed!  Manly men are hot and that’s all there is to it!  Sweat, adrenaline & testosterone fill the screen when these guys perform.

Outstanding Screenplay for a Feature Film:  Sometimes it takes a good story to turn the heat up.  These stories and plots moved the sex along and actually made fucking even hotter.

Outstanding Pro/Am Movie:  Who needs big budgets?  Movies like these are hot because of the authenticity of the performance of the models.  You come in, you fuck, you come, you leave.

Outstanding Performance of the Year:  Bottom, top, twink, bear, stud, oral, fisting, bareback, piss, spanking…. no matter what these guys did, you’d get the movie because they were in it!

Outstanding Performance

Outstanding Film of the Year:  These movies have achieve greatness indeed.  The formula for calculating this category? Easy.  If it could stick out in the mind of the jaded Product Manager of a distributor that carries over 400 films, with 3 new releases a week, after 800 hours of viewing lots of similar content, it’s a keeper.

So there you have it, my friends; my list of must haves from 2009.  As I’ve mentioned before, this year will be a most exciting one.  Until next time.

-Hugo Harley, Your Certified GPA.

I’m BAAAACCCKKK!

Fellow GPAs:

I am back from my much needed mini-vakay.  2009 really took a lot out me and I had to recharge to  bring you news from behind the scenes of the gay porn world.  Looking back at 2009, I’m really happy to have had so much fun doing something I love: watching gay porn… Many a queer would love to be in my position, I know.  So, my promise to you is to make this year even better than last year.  Especially now that I’m working on Horns & Halos…. (whoops did I give away the title of the next Cocky Boys movie?!)  Well, you can expect a lot of secrets (and semen) spilled this upcoming year.

Before I delve into porn news and the happenings of the company, I’d like to dedicate this weekend to the talent of 2009.  Since there will be no GAYVNs this year, I’ve decided to give out my own awards: the Harley Awards for Outstanding Achievement in Gay Adult Movies.  Everybody loves to be recognized for their work…porn producers are no different.  I’ve already calculated that I spent over 800 hours in the past year watching porn movies.  It’s time to put that time to good use.  Now unlike other awards, there is no one winner of these awards (face it, EVERYBODY wins when there’s an orgasm to be had).  Instead, I’ll name 3 winners in every category mentioned.

AND, each of these movies could be found on StudMall.com or sites of which I am a major fan (surprise, surprise.)

Outstanding Topping Performance:  These men commanded their scenes…. and their submissive bottoms.  When looking at their performance, you wanted to be on the receiving end of whatever they were dishing out.

Outstanding Bottoming Performance:  It takes a great (and hung!) man to be a top…. it takes an even greater (and tighter) man to be a bottom.  These bottoms made you wish that you came home to them…. in bed… wearing their knees as earrings.

Outstanding Bottoms

Outstanding Direction:  A director carefully crafts a movie to make an orgasmic vision.  These talented directors have made movies that make us cum EVERY time.

Outstanding Direction of the Year

Outstanding Twink Feature:  Boys Boys Boys!  These fey young things make our pants get tighter as they move their lithe bodies.

Outstanding Twink Features

Don’t worry guys, I’ll have more awards soon including Outstanding Actor and Outstanding Film!

-Hugo Harley, Your Certified GPA

I hope your weekend was better than mine. For those who slept through it (like myself), there was a huge snowstorm over the weekend that left 22 inches of snow in some places. Because I live in the asshole of NYC, I was home bound for the better part of the last 3 days waiting for the walkways to be cleared. Thankfully, I was able to make it work and be present… physically.

Now onward! I’m happy to be able to present to you guys my first of this year’s TOP 10 lists.  Because I’m a salesman at heart, this first list was quite easy to make.  It’s a list of the bestselling and best reviewed DVDs released in 2009 from Euro Media Distribution, the company that bought you some of the hottest men and gay porn in recent times.  Now, this list is PURELY based on factual numbers.  Unlike some other lists, I will not  favor any one release over the other.  (Though it does help that this is a list of my company’s DVDs.)  And coincidentally, you can find all these releases on StudMall.com.  (This plug has nothing to do with my close friendship with Ben Morecock.)

Eurocreme's Straight Boy

At #10, we have one of my personal favorites, Straight Boy.  Straight Boy features SUPER HUNG Matt Hughes in the title role.  What makes this movie special is that this is the first Eurocreme/Dream Boy title to feature some cock on the cover (a giant gag-inducing cock at that!) I will say that this movie was VERY well made, had a lot of hot guys and Matt Hughes actually steals the show in this one!  He’s a great actor and could plow the hell out of anybody and make them feel grateful for being split open.

Here’s a quick synopsis: Cute twink Andy gets a new roommate–studly 11″ Matt Hughes, straight as they come! Cum-hungry Ricky wants in on the action, desperate for Matt’s huge cock. Lots of smooth twinks in group fucking: spitroasting & cum-covered faces galore! Grinding down against throbbing dicks, these boys are after as much cock as they can, ready and willing, and up for anything, take a look at just how much they love the taste of spunk!!

Buy STRAIGHT BOY HERE!

Hung Ladz 3: Hard Shooter

At #9, we have the 3rd movie of the Hung Ladz series: Hard Shooters.  Cover model Philippe Delvaux has recently become a fan favorite (as well as gaining a spot in Hugo Harley’s heart).  The hot thing about this is Philippe is a natural bottom.  (Big-dicked bottoms are like leprechauns: when you find one, you hold on so you can exploit his treasure.)  I guess I’ll mention that Matt Hughes is in this one also.

Synopsis: Filled with the sexiest hung guys ever, these lads are real hard fuckers and shooters who love to work tight butts open with thick shafts and spraying them with warm jizz.  Delicious new faces and popular stars join forces in the third instalment from Hung Ladz, the perfect studio for cravers of big cock!!

Buy HUNG LADZ 3: HARD SHOOTERS here!

Cocky Boys: Born To Fuck

For a movie that came out just 1 month ago, Born To Fuck placing at #8 is NOTHING to scoff at.  At times it takes several months for DVDs to reach bestseller status.  Born To Fuck did so in a matter of weeks.  I’ve always said that Kyle Majors has chosen the MOST BEAUTIFUL men to star in his movies.  This first DVD is a testament to that fact.  Coverboy Sebastian Young is a tough guy from the other side of the tracks.  Wolf Hudson is one of the kinkiest straight men I’ve seen.  Jesse Santana gives other bottoms a run for their money. Harem Hottie Phenix Saint makes me quiver.  Even the solo scene with Max Hammer is enough to make anyone lose it.

It may also help you to know that Born to fuck is the No. 2 bestselling movie in America as well the No. 1 selling DVD on StudMall.com.

Buy BORN TO FUCK here.

Eurocreme's Porn Boy

#7 is my FAVORITE Eurocreme/Dream Boy movie of the year: Porn Boy!  As I’ve said in an earlier review, I liked “touches about how the actors react to being sucked off, their future aspirations, and taking Matt Hughes 11 inches of hard cock—you’re a champ Jak Williams!—to be quite a turn-on. The stars that we’ve watched many a times being pounded, taking gobs of wet juicy semen on their faces or taking at least two hung uncut cocks up their tight holes at the same time…they have lives beyond the camera.”

I easily found the interaction with the audience by the models to be the richest part of the movie.  (I’m a porn fanboy… sue me.)  Plus it helps that Matt Hughes, Philippe Delvaux, & newcummer Will Jamieson were in it!

Buy PORN BOY here!

Eurocreme's Party Boy

For now I’ll leave you with our #6 DVD of 2009: Party Boy.  With a tight story, gorgeous boys and hot sex scenes, this Dream Boy release was a good one.  Best scene for me was Kai Cruz fucking the beautiful, delectable tatooed twink: Ivan Rueda.  (I had to fight the urge to lick the screen to get at Ivan’s tattoos…)

Synopsis: Kai Cruz is the gorgeous DJ, taking us through a typical sex crazed weekend, packed with stunning clubbers, horned up twinks and enough dick to satisfy the most cum hungry boys out there. Working his way through the London scene, it’s a look into the fuck-fuelled life of just how easy it is to get the attention you want when you can spin the decks.

Buy PARTY BOY here!

I leave you guys now to rest up.  Tomorrow I’ll have the remaining Top 10 DVDs of 2009 from Euro Media Distribution.  Here’s a hint at who’s No. 1: It’s a biggie!

Yours truly:

Hugo Harley, Your Certified GPA

I hope you guys had a great weekend because I sure did.  I spent my time scouring the internet for a cock, ass, or face I hadn’t seen.  And behold, I was able to have a chat with one of my favorite people from across the pond: Simon Booth.  Any GPA worth his cumrag knows that Simon is the award-winning director of some of Eurocreme’s DreamBoy hits!  His work with Straight Boy was amazing.  Porn Boy, for me, hit the spot!

Now THAT is my kind of job!

Simon Booth’s newest film, House Boy, delved into a world I often fantasized about: the wealthy older gentlemen, the prestige, the interplay… ::sigh::  Anyway, not only was I able to speak to Simon about the new upcoming film, I was able to obtain some stills from House Boy itself. [I'm way too classy to repeat the things I did to give you guys this sneak peek.] 

Hugo Harley: Hey Simon. How are you?

Simon Booth: Hi! I’m good, very busy, as always! Just been doing the trailer for HouseBoy today and trying to sort the cast for Hung Ladz.

HH: I could understand that.  You’re the director/producer of how many lines now?

SB:  I’m doing 3 lines, DreamBoy, Rudeboiz and Hung Ladz.

SB: Keeps me very busy.

HH: That’s very cool. And those are bestselling lines with distinctive looks. How would you describe the content of each of the DreamBoy line?

SB: Well, DreamBoy is our premiere range, and our flagship range.  It’s glossy, with high production values, very cute young guys (18 – 24) with good bodies, and a cute story, often with a sense of humor; a bit tongue in cheek

HH: I definitely agree. Spy Boy, Soldier Boy and Porn Boy were some of my faves from the DreamBoy line.

SB:  I’m glad you like those – I really like those titles too, I’m really proud of the work I did on them with Max Lincoln. Porn Boy was mine; the others you mentioned were directed by Max Lincoln.

SB:  Rudeboiz guys tend to have very short hair, or shaved heads, like skinhead style, and wear sporty clothes, trackie bottoms, trainers, a cap, a cheap chain.

SB:  [They’re] a bit aggressive looking, they pride themselves on being straight looking and straight-acting.

HH: The Hung Ladz series, obviously, uses well endowed models.  Is it hard finding guys to fit those criteria?

SB:  It’s really hard to find guys big enough!

SB:  I set the minimum size at 8.5 inches (which is about 22 – 23 cm I think.)

HH: Going for the gold, I see!

SB: It’s difficult finding sexy guys with good bodies AND cocks that big and then of course, it can be difficult finding a good passive guy to comfortably take these hung ladz!

SB:  So it’s ALL very challenging – and then doing everything to get the best out of them

SB:  That’s a big part of the job of a director

SB:  It’s partly good casting, partly filming technique, and partly getting the best out of them.

HH: Excellent.

HH: So let’s talk about Dream Boy for a moment, specifically your new one coming out, House Boy.

HH: What do you have planned for House Boy?  What’s the story like?

Typical House Boy Uniform: Birthday Suit!

SB:  HouseBoy – well it’s about TWO guys that are friends. Both are very cute twinks with great bodies: one is active and one is passive.

SB:  They work as cleaners for diff guys, doing cleaning in their underwear, which ever way their clients want them to be dressed – jockstraps, sexy undies etc.

SB:  The film follows them over a weekend – seeing them at work and play and over the course of that, the passive one (the gorgeous Steven Tyler who was the cover boy for Porn Boy) finds himself falling for his client – a very sexy man with an incredible body and a pretty huge cock too.

SB:  We don’t often have older guys in DreamBoy films, but for the story, it was important.

SB: It makes a nice change to sometimes see a cute twink getting really fucked hard by a muscular manly type.

HH: It is always nice to see.

HH: So who else could we expect to see in House Boy?

SB: We have some very cute new twinks.

SB:  We also have the stunning Will Richards, who starred in Porn Boy.

The weekly job-proficiency exam

SB:  I had to get him back as he was SO nice to work with, a really cool guy, and great at sex as well – he gets hard in 2 seconds and then stays rock solid the entire time, even when we stop.

HH: Could we take moment talk about Will?

HH: Where did you find him?  He’s gorgeous and hot!

SB: He applied to us, direct to the Eurocreme website.

HH: It’s safe to say then the UK is chock full of hot talent waiting for their debut.

Just slide it now boy....

HH: So, as a Gay Porn Addict, I’m always looking for that “it” in every film I see, whether it be a particular model, a particular scene or even a memorable sexual moment (ie Ashley Ryder taking a dildo and a cock at the same time!)

HH: What could a jaded porn connoisseur like me look forward to in House Boy?

SB:  Oo that’s a tough one…!

SB: There is nothing extreme. (I think that’s what you mean by ‘memorable’ lol?)

HH:  Maybe… (blush)

SB:  Well we have the popular as ever Alex Stevens in a very hot 3-some with Steven Tyler, and a cute twink from America [John Hyde]…

SB:  And I think the end scene with Steven Tyler and Neil Stevens, the muscular Canadian guy, is GREAT.

SB:  Just pay attention to Steven Tyler – he is SO adorable, stunningly cute; his body just gets better and better and he is a nice little actor also, very honest and open.  He’s really sporty – which you see in the opening credits.

HH: Awesome!

HH: Thanks a lot Simon!  It was great talking with you.  I’m sure we’re looking forward to this next great movie from Dream Boy!

SB: Cheers!

You heard it here first guys!  Simon Booth’s newest DreamBoy title, House Boy is now in post-production!  It includes several new stars on the scene and especially the delectable Will Richards and Alex Stevens.  And who could miss out on a bit of hot hunk-on-twink action!  Stay tuned for more news on House Boy coming soon!

Hunk-boy lovin'!

-Hugo Harley, Certified GPA

So there’s this new film, right? Well…it’s not new per se in that it hasn’t even been released in the states yet! However, being the awesome little cocksucker that I am, I have what we call “friends in high places” and therefore can bring you an exclusive pre-release REVIEW from one of my good friends, and GPA (Gay porn addict…self-professed) Hugo Harley!

Before we begin with the review, here’s a little somethin-somethin to pique your curiosity. Whose massive member is featured below? Can ya guess? Can ya??? Here’s a hint: this all-star cast boasts not ELEVEN but TEN sexy boys including (but not limited to) Shane Stone, Matt Hughes, NEWCUMMER Will Richards, Alex Stevens, Phillipe Delvaux, and Jak Williams.

Secondly, and this is for my dear reader JAKE who commented (unlike the rest of you vaginas) several posts back, about what he wanted to see. And you know…THE Studmuffin delivers. Not unlike the empanadas I’m having delivered to my apartment on this rainy, rainy day:

ANYWAY. And now for your official review:

“My hobbies? I just like going to the gym and making porn….I’d like to be a big porn star.”

Watching the delectable Philippe Delvaux speak definitely makes one’s groin tingle (in a good way of course.) I’ll be the first to admit that it took me a while to warm up to this Belgian cutie. But hearing him speak in Simon Booth’s latest feature, Porn Boy, I immediately fell in love with him. (It doesn’t hurt that he’s got a nice huge cock and is an expert at taking a pounding—both plusses for this reviewer!)

In his newest film, Booth (Straight Boy, Legion Boy, Borstal Boy) describes Porn Boy as “a film that blends fiction with reality.” And it does so well, I must add. Though this concept of showcasing the ‘behind-the-scenes’ aspect of porn has been done before, this is the first film I’ve seen that goes beyond and breaks down the proverbial 4^th wall of gay porn.

In the first scene, we find the hunky Will Jamieson (Office Boy, Borstal Boy) filling in the role of a plumber and fixing Tristan Dean’s sink. After a few remarks, we find lithe twink Tristan slobbering on Will’s meaty cock. Soon, Tristan is on all fours being pounded by Will. One facial later, Will Jamieson recites his line: “Next time you need my hard plunger, just give me a call.” Will immediately bursts out laughing, looks directly into the camera and asks the director if the line could be changed.

Throughout Porn Boy, I found these touches about how the actors react to being sucked off, their future aspirations, and taking Matt Hughes 11 inches of hard cock—you’re a champ Jak Williams!—to be quite a turn-on. The stars that we’ve watched many a times being pounded, taking gobs of wet juicy semen on their faces or taking at least two hung uncut cocks up their tight holes at the same time…they have lives beyond the camera.

Now usually at this point, I like to point out the star/actor that made me finally blow a load all over my keyboard. I’m happy to say that it was a 3-way tie: Alex Stevens, Philippe Delvaux, & newcummer Will Richards. We all know that Philippe Delvaux is just too sexy and adorable not to comment on. Alex Stevens has grown up to be such a studly little fucker. (Have you seen those abs?!) Now Will Richards… somebody better keep an eye on this one. Playing the role of a Eurocreme Production Assistant, Richards narrates the events of the film and gives us brief little intros to all the scenes and their stars. His hot little body and beautiful sea-green eyes were enough to keep my attention throughout the movie. The recurring thought in Will’s mind is: Should I finally get in front of the camera and take the plunge…into somebody’s ass?

In all, Porn Boy is tight little feature that interweaves fact and fiction. Starring Matt Hughes, Alex Stevens, Will Jamieson, Shane Stone, Jak Williams, Philippe Delvaux, Will Richards and several others, this movie explores the going-ons of a Eurocreme Production. I call it a gem of a movie that is different from the other Dream Boy Productions.

Porn Boy receives 4 out 5 StudMuffins from Hugo Harley, your Resident Porn Addict.